Hello from the study,

The title of today’s post comes from that Simon and Garfunkel song (The Boxer). I feel that I have been in a fifteen rounder at times, but I am still very blessed. I have good friends and people who have supported me in so many ways. What is it that makes us who were are?

I am just a poor boy
Though my story’s seldom told
I have squandered my resistance
For a pocket full of mumbles such are promises
All lies and jests
Still a man hears what he wants to hear
And disregards the rest

I think about this . . . . though I am not sure my resistance was squandered. Indeed, some hear what they will and disregard logic, truth or fairness. But it is always up to those who experience such an event to manage it. In the time I have been a sufferer with Crohn’s I have learned valuable lessons. It is hard for me to believe that I have managed this disease for 25 years ~almost half my life. I am amazed by that fact. While I would not wish the disease, its symptoms or its conseqences, on anyone, I have been very fortunate. For in spite of surgeries and other complications, I have been blessed to learn some valuable lessons. I know that more than anything, being healthy is the most important thing that someone can have. All the money, toys or anything else one might accumulate is irrelevant if you do not feel well.

My father once told me to choose my battles wisely and fight them well. I am not sure I have always done that and, perhaps, in this latest one, I failed miserably, but I did not realize it was supposed to be a battle. In fact, I am quite sure it should not be, but nevertheless it was. Though as with all things, or so it seems, it was another thing to learn. I am reminded of Norman Maclean’s phenomenal quote at the end of the his novella "A River Runs Through It," he wrote "eventually, all things merge into one, and a river runs through it. The river was cut by the world’s great flood and runs over rocks from the basement of time. On some of those rocks are timeless raindrops. Under the rocks are the words, and some of the words are theirs. I am haunted by waters." ~ Norman Maclean~ and so it is  . . . in each place we travel and pause we leave something. For those I have offended or failed, I ask your forgiveness. When I have done less than my best while working with you, I can only take accountability for that shortcoming. For those I have been fortunate to help, I am also grateful for the opportunity to work with you.

Menomonie has been, mostly, a joyful place and a time for significant growth. That is quite amazing when one considers I was middle aged when I arrived here almost six years ago. In my first journal entry about Menomonie, I noted it was kind of small town Americana. I still think that. The municipal band plays in the bandshell on Tuesday nights in the summer. Church ladies sell fresh-baked pies and pastries and the boy scouts raise the flag. Flower baskets decorate the streets and the mayor has a very funny weekly newspaper column. I have been blessed to be here. What is a place? Again, I ask that question. As Maclean’s waters, I am haunted by it.

I have appreciated the response of people and I think of Hawkeye’s small speech to his compatriots on the final episode of M*A*S*H. I paraphrase: "I can’t say that I have [liked] you all either, but I have [liked] as many of you as I could." Perhaps the most important thing I have learned is that it is okay to "not like" someone. It is okay to have weaknesses, and more important we need to me as comfortable with our weaknesses as we are our strengths. There will be much to do in the next weeks and I am flying to Pennsylvania in a week or so to try to set the foundation. It is both exciting and a little frightening, but I am very fortunate to work with a former colleague and to be there with his wonderful family. That is most exciting.

More soon . . .

Michael